Why I Need to Extend My Apartment Rental Agreement and a Small Repair Request
Overview
This is a semi-formal letter to a landlord, Mr. Dahiya, requesting an extension of a rental agreement and reporting a maintenance issue. The tenant, Ankit, wishes to extend the lease until April 2025 due to enrollment in a nearby personal support worker program. The letter also mentions a malfunctioning water heater in the kitchen and requests a technician to fix it. The tone is polite and respectful, aiming to maintain a positive relationship with the landlord.
Key Features
- Clearly states the intention to extend the rental agreement.
- Provides a valid reason for the extension request (educational program).
- Reports a specific maintenance problem (broken water heater).
- Maintains a polite and respectful tone throughout.
- Uses a standard letter format with appropriate salutation and closing.
Our Review
This letter effectively communicates the tenant's needs to the landlord. The reasons for extending the lease are clearly stated, and the inclusion of the broken water heater is appropriate. We believe the letter could be improved by adding a bit more detail about the personal support worker program to emphasize the importance of staying in the current location. Additionally, while the language is polite, incorporating slightly more formal vocabulary could enhance the letter's overall impact. Overall, it's a well-structured and clear request.
Original Topic
Five months ago, you started renting an apartment on a six-month agreement. You now wish to stay in the apartment for longer than the six months you originally agreed with the owner. Write a letter to the owner of your apartment. In your letter • say how long you now want to rent the apartment for • explain why your plans have changed • tell the owner about a problem in the apartment
Student Submission
Dear Mr. Dahiya,
I hope this letter finds you well. I am writing this letter to express my intent to stay in your rented apartment for longer than six months that I agreed to earlier. According to the signed agreement, the six months will get completed in January but I wish to stay here till April 2025.
I have enrolled myself in a personal support worker program in an institution that is in proximity to this location. The course will be ending in March 2025, so I want you to allow me stay here till April. You have always been kind and generous to me which is also a reason, I don’t wish to vacate this apartment and find a new one for a small period of time.
I also want to draw your attention towards some minor inconvenience I have been facing here. From the last two days, the water heater in kitchen is not working and it feels very cold to wash utensils with cold water. It will be a great help if you can send a technician to check for the problem.
I look forward to hearing from you positively. Yours faithfully Ankit
IELTS Essay Assessment
1. Letter Task Analysis:
- Letter Type: Semi-formal
- Purpose: Request to extend rental agreement and report a minor repair.
- Target Reader: Apartment owner (Mr. Dahiya)
- Key Requirements:
- State desired rental extension length (April 2025).
- Explain reason for change of plans (enrollment in a nearby program).
- Report a problem in the apartment (broken water heater).
2. Content Coverage:
- Opening: Salutation is appropriate and purpose is clearly stated in the first paragraph.
- Main Points: All three key requirements are addressed. The letter clearly states the desired extension, provides a reason, and reports the faulty water heater.
- Closing: Closing is polite and anticipates a positive response.
- Tone: The tone is appropriately semi-formal; polite and respectful but not overly stiff.
3. Letter Organization:
- Format: Standard letter format is used.
- Paragraphing: Paragraphs are logically divided, each addressing a specific aspect.
- Flow: The flow of information is clear and easy to follow.
- Length: The letter is adequately long, exceeding the 150-word minimum.
4. Language Usage:
- Style Appropriacy: The style is appropriate for a semi-formal letter.
- Vocabulary Range: Vocabulary is adequate, though some more sophisticated words could be used.
- Grammar Control: Grammar is mostly accurate with minor issues (see below).
- Expression Clarity: The message is clear and easily understood.
5. Detailed Band Scores:
- Task Achievement: 7/9 [All requirements are met, information is clear and relevant. Could benefit from slightly more detail regarding the course and its relevance to the apartment's location.]
- Coherence & Cohesion: 7/9 [Logical flow, good paragraphing. Transitions could be slightly smoother.]
- Lexical Resource: 6/9 [Vocabulary is functional but lacks range and precision in places. Could benefit from more sophisticated vocabulary.]
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Grammar: 7/9 [Mostly accurate, minor grammatical issues (e.g., "six months will get completed").]
Overall Band: 7/9
6. Specific Letter Features:
For Semi-formal Letters:
- Tone Balance: Well-balanced, polite and friendly without being overly casual.
- Style Mix: Effective mix of formal and informal language.
- Reader Awareness: Shows consideration for the landlord's perspective.
7. Improvement Suggestions:
- Format Improvements: None needed.
- Content Improvements: Elaborate slightly on the proximity of the institution to the apartment. Quantify the "minor inconvenience" of the cold water – e.g., "making it difficult to wash dishes effectively."
- Language Improvements: Replace phrases like "will get completed" with more concise and sophisticated alternatives (e.g., "expires"). Use stronger verbs and more precise vocabulary. For example, instead of "kind and generous," consider "accommodating and helpful."
- Style Improvements: Consider adding a sentence expressing gratitude for the landlord's previous assistance or positive experiences.
8. Model Essay:
Dear Mr. Dahiya,
I hope this letter finds you well. I am writing to request an extension on my current rental agreement for the apartment at [Apartment Address]. The current six-month agreement expires in January, but I would like to extend my tenancy until April 2025.
My plans have changed due to my enrollment in a personal support worker program at [Institution Name], which is conveniently located very close to the apartment, only a [distance] walk away. The course concludes in March 2025, and I would greatly appreciate the opportunity to remain in the apartment for an additional month to facilitate a smooth transition. Your previous accommodating and helpful nature is a significant factor in my desire to avoid the inconvenience of relocating so soon after settling in.
Furthermore, I would like to report a minor issue. The kitchen water heater has malfunctioned for the past two days, making it difficult to wash dishes effectively due to the cold water. It would be a great help if you could arrange for a technician to assess and repair the problem at your earliest convenience.
Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to your positive response.
Yours faithfully, Ankit